马克·吐温(Mark Twain)

马克·吐温（Mark Twain，1835年11月30日-1910年4月21日 ），原名萨缪尔·兰亨·克莱门（Samuel Langhorne Clemens），美国作家、演说家，“马克·吐温”是他的笔名，原是密西西比河水手使用的表示在航道上所测水的深度的术语。

“If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.”

“Good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.”

“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to reform (or pause and reflect).”

“I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.”

“A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.”

“Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.”

“Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.”

“In a good bookroom you feel in some mysterious way that you are absorbing the wisdom contained in all the books through your skin, without even opening them.”

“Substitute 'damn' every time you're inclined to write 'very;' your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.”

“Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.”

“Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.”

“I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”

“God created war so that Americans would learn geography.”

“I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn’t know.”

“Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option.”

“But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most?”

“The difference between the almost right word and the right word is really a large matter. ’tis the difference between the lightning bug and the lightning.”

“Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.”

“I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.”

“Wrinkles should merely indicate where the smiles have been.”

“Books are for people who wish they were somewhere else.”